I have never in my more than 20 years of being involved with the newspaper industry seen anything as crazy as the story about a woman who chased down a would-be chicken thief. The Galveston County Daily News reported last week that a woman had bought $22 worth of fried chicken, only to have it snatched from the front seat of her car while she shopped for drinks in a convenience store.
When she got into her car, she noticed her mouth-watering dinner had vanished. So she went on a hunt for the culprit.
Eye witnesses told her they saw a man break her window, grab the chicken and flee.
And it made her mad.
The woman zoomed away in her car, determined to find the chicken thief. A few blocks away she found him, standing on a corner devouring her food. When she tried to get her dinner back, he punched her in the face. But she took him out with a body slam.
In the end, the man was arrested after good police work by the hungry woman.
Lesson for the day: Taking fried chicken away from a grown woman is not nearly as easy as taking candy from a baby.
Rain, rain, go away
Come again another day. Although itís nice to have the rain and cooler temperatures, enough is enough. We need some sunshine! I bought outdoor plants before the rain began and thought that they would do well. When I was in Kentucky, I couldnít grow an Ivy plant and you know those are hard to kill. I thought maybe it would be different out here in Texas. They started out looking pretty good. The rain was coming and going, keeping them healthy, until the recent deluge choked the life right out of them.
One of my good friends told me she was going to bring over some type of plant to put in my landscaping that wouldnít die no matter how I abused it.
Needless to say I donít have a green thumb. Itís black from all that newspaper ink.
Pain, pain, go away
After sleeping in on July Fourth, I got up and fixed breakfast, watched TV, did some laundry, when all of a sudden I was struck with a brilliant idea; my sons and I would go bowling.
When I walked through the door of the bowling alley, I couldnít see a thing because it was dark. My kids shouted, "Mom! Today is cosmic bowling, Awesome!"
I knew I was going to have a hard time bowling (Itís been a while since Iíve exercised), but I was in trouble with the lights out. My kids insisted on playing five games, which left me breathless. Bowling is fun and the atmosphere was great, but boy, did I ache the next day. I couldnít even walk. One of my employees watched as I limped around the office and finally gave me a great piece of advice.
"It doesnít pay to exercise," she said.
And sheís right. Itís too painful.
Rochelle Stidham is publisher of the Empire-Tribune. She can be reached at (254) 965-3124, ext. 225, or firstname.lastname@example.org.